Until Then

One day I’ll be less irritable and impatient…until then

One day I’ll stop pushing people away when they try to help me…until then

One day I’ll learn to appreciate opposing perspectives…until then

One day I’ll stop seeing the worst in people and start recognizing their qualities…until then

One day I’ll learn to reach for help when I’m drowning in my own emotions..until then

One day I’ll grow, learn, and appreciate more of my surroundings..until then

One day I’ll love those who persecute me…until then

One day I’ll stop disregarding people’s feelings and start respecting them…until then

One day I’ll strive for happiness and not contentment…until then

One day I’ll be a better, stronger, more emotionally competnent me, until then I accept my flaws, seek to better them, but appreciate my imperfections.







Interesting thought..personally I have almost no straight male friends. I’ve always ended up falling for them.

Captain Awkward

February 5, 2013: Thanks for all the cool comments and discussion, but I can’t keep up with the moderation demands right now. Comments on this entry are now closed.

Yesterday I saw this TweetThe piece linked there asks the question: “Can married women have straight male friends?” and suggests that friendships between straight men and straight women can be very difficult, partially based on a study about how some men and women might view their friendships differently:

Recently a study published in Scientific American stated that women are much more likely to be able to keep male friends platonic, while men have a harder time. The article states that these friendships are masked by a cover-up of sexual impulses by one of the parties. It said that men were far more attracted to their female friends and assumed their female friends felt the same, when they didn’t. Females…

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“Maybe you’ll wait for me–maybe you’re gone”- Sondre Lerche

Waiting to hear back from the tons of teachers, advisors, and abroad counselors I feel as if my  dreams are on hold. Since chosing SLU as the place to sponsor the last leg of shaping my persona, I found it essential to complement this journey with a trip abroad. Only, once have I visited another country. In 2010, I went to Costa Rica for 11 days and it was by far one of the most incredible experiences of my life. At the risk of being cliche, I fear to venture off into naming the ways its changed me. I will say this though, it implanted a wanderlust mentality into my spirit. Along with the debate about course equavilencies and other inconsequential discussions the major conflict is my dream of going abroad is on halt for the realities at hand. Whether or not I can actually picture myself in Tanzania or Cape Town depends on the finalization of things in several different people’s hands. They simple have no idea how agonizing it is for me to not know where exactly I’ll be studying,living, and growing in the Fall or Spring. Until then I suppose I’ll twiddle my thumbs, avoid work I should be doing, and dream of distant lands I may never see.



“Beware because the winds of change they blow, and everything must go…”-The Foreign Exchange

Our celestial presence on this earth are numbered and calculated. Will I chant this to myself everyday, and weigh every action and choice as if it were my last? I know that I should but this is easier said than done. As one of my favorite groups explains the winds of change are blowing. My chaotic relationship with change goes somewhat like this: I love change (weather, new music, new clothes, hairstyles, nail polish etc), but in terms of relationships with others, reminiscing on fond memories I am rather immovable when it comes to that. I love my family  all of our arguing, and hurtful words thrown at each other I would rather this change. But all the family vacations, birthday dinners, and unconventional holiday traditions should never change. Lately, however it seems as if we are all cars speeding down a multi-lane highway towards different destinations, with no regard to the other cars on the road. With this mentality it is only evident that eventually we’ll all split down different exits–or crash into each other. Years ago however we would check our blind spots to ensure we all were okay, now we switch lanes, change life careers and disrespect each other without looking both ways. How can this change? How can we get back to one solid, unified, orderly “lane”. Only through the power of prayer. I know that regardless of how far it seems we stray from each other and moreover from Christ–the one thing that remains unchanged is the love of Christ. My prayer goes as such:

“Dear Lord,

You’ve blessed me with a special and loving family. As of now we feel disconnected from you and from each other. I pray that you remove all barriers and obstacles keeping us from each other and unite us under your love and your words. I ask that you forgive us for forsaking each other and acting selfishlessly. I praise you for all that you’ve blessed us with and I pray that you strengthen us individually, and as a family. We will bless your name forever more.

Your Humble Servant,


I realize that one day everything indeed must go. I hope that before that day I will be able to over come all my inner and external struggles and live in the heights of the human experience and fly to the mountains of ecstasy.

In Peace,


One Lane Highway


As a future educator I really appreciate articles like this!


The WordPress.com Blog

Last month, we attended the Modern Language Association’s annual conference in Boston, Massachusetts, and had a great time talking to educators about how WordPress.com encourages in-class conversations to keep going and keeps students and parents up to date. Today, we’re taking a closer look at how some tech-savvy teachers are using WordPress.com to create educational experiences that seamlessly blend the traditional and virtual worlds.

The Paper-Free Class Experiment

My name is Mr. Hays and I teach 8th grade Language Arts. I am a National Board Certified teacher, and I have been reflecting on my role as a teacher this past summer. This year, I  have decided to try a radically different approach to teaching. I want to step away from the traditional classroom for a while and see just how much we can do online.

With The Paper-Free Class Experiment, Florida middle school English teacher James Hays has built…

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“If you lose me, I must be saved.”- Madeleine Peyroux

The idea of salvation from both Christ and from humanity is one of the hundreds of thousands of thoughts that run through my mind each day. Reflecting on my many errors, wrong paths taken, and disobedience–I wonder if I’m worth saving. I wonder why when at times I have no strength to save myself or lift my achy, weak, down-trodden spirits, how one word from the Lord has the ability to erase all my negative thoughts. Alternatively, how those words make me think “Will I ever move from this place?” and “Will I ever stop making the same mistakes?” And at what costs will I overcome all my evils, and temptations and how will that feel. The stress of weighing all my decisions, compounded with the constant questioning “Well look at what they’re doing, do they feel this bad?” seems never-ending, but I know it is not warranted. In terms of losing my own humanity, and whether or not they can to an extent “save me”, seems close to home also.  The human experience has allowed me to experience a range of emotions from extreme euphoria, to the depths and the abysses of my at times eerily dark, psyche. It was a human who physically lifted me from the ground, as a I felt my soul sinking into the earth. But, it was the word of God, that reminded me that this state was not permanent. So goes my favorite phrase “Trust me dear, it’s only temporary”. Hopefully, as I dive into the “blog-osphere”, I’ll get better at this and learn the do’s and don’ts. But, as for now accept this sincere, severely disorganized blog post.

Exodus 15:2 “The LORD is my strength and my song, and he is become my salvation: he is my God, and I will prepare him an habitation; my father’s God, and I will exalt him.”

In Peace,